Well, isn’t that interesting

Some blogs I read linked to this “I Write Like” analyzer, where you paste in a bunch of text and it tells you what famous writer it sounds like. Of course, I tried it. I thought I’d share some results.

When I pasted in my story “The Other End” (which, holy smokes, you can read here), my results were:

I might mention that I’ve never read anything by Margaret Mitchell.

Okay, so let’s try something easier. How about “A Metaphor,” which is a clear homage to Raymond Chandler and even begins with a quotation from him…

Hm. Okay. I’ve at least read a lot of Palahniuk, so I’m willing to believe it’s rubbed off on my writing somewhat.

But let’s try pasting in the same story, but this time include the actual epigraph from Chandler — which is, by the way, “When in doubt, have a man come through a door with a gun in his hand.”

Ah, there we go. Apparently Raymond Chandler and Chuck Palahniuk are more closely related than I would have thought. Just a few words difference, really.

One more test. I paste in the first few pages of my top secret, heavily guarded, much-rumored-about novel…

Ha! This one’s kind of funny. The book does make what I hope are sly, fancy-pants allusions to Ulysses throughout. However, I don’t think the actual writing style reads anything like Joyce.

So, if this text analyzer can be trusted at all,  it seems I write like a number of famous authors, with a wide variety of styles, some of whom I’ve never actually read.

Or, I’d say, they write like me.

But the main conclusion I can draw from this is: I have spent too much time playing with this thing.

Sorry, wrong number

I’ve got a new flash-fiction piece up on the Interwebs that you might like to check out.

Keepgoing.org just published “The Other End” in their 38th online issue.

It’s a short story about a phone call, with characters named Jacob and Mary, because I apparently get all my character names from the Bible.

Once again, I’m in good company, and you should check out the other stuff in the issue too. After you’ve poured over my shining work of brilliance, of course.

Happy new year.

Me, Raymond Chandler, and a metaphor

As promised, I’ve got some news about a fiction publication.

The Catalonian Review, a pretty neat online lit journal, just posted a flash-fiction piece of mine in their newest edition.

You should go read it. It’s called “A Metaphor,” and opens with a quotation I love from Raymond Chandler, master of the detective novel.

You might like it. At the very least, it’s short.

New site is up!

I moved

I’m back after a several month lapse of updates. My excuse: I’ve moved from Long Island to Albany. What I learned: I own too many things. Heavy things in particular. Albany seems pretty fun so far. If you happen to live in Albany and know of interesting things happening, let me know.

Anyway, I have new stuff up now. A couple poems, and a new (at least, new to you) section from that novella I was talking about last time. This particular section doesn’t have a name, but it’s the first chapter from the novella. The whole thing’s called “Weekend Campers.” I finished writing it a while ago, but I’m still playing around with the project and getting feedback from people. I expect to be completely finished with it by January of 2084.

Oh, and John bought expensive website-building software and updated his site. Go check it out. The link’s on the “Other” section of this site.

New stuff on the site

Well, I’m back after two months with no updates. No, I didn’t forget I had a website.

Anyway, I’ve got some new stuff up on the site now. There’s a new piece in the Fiction section: an excerpt from a novella I’m playing with. There’s also a “new” poem in the Poetry section that’s actually pretty old, but I felt like putting it up anyway. Also, back in Fiction, I screwed around with “Fuck Henry” as per some of John’s suggestions, and now you can read the (slightly different) new version.

And check out the Other section. There are now links to Tori’s site and John’s site. Do it!